Saturday, July 31, 2004

I'm not completely Insane...

... but maybe just a little bit crazy..."
Alana Davis - Crazy
I'm in a Alana-Davis-sort-of mood. I guess it's because finally I sat down and actually payed attention to each one of the words of the lyrics.
I'm working today and that sucks, but I don't have a choice since I got the past Monday for free.
An Tuesday too, althought that was because I woke up paralyzed.
This was a very bizarre week. Absolutely bizarre.
Everything started last Saturday. I called my family and I was talking to my mom when she mentioned the murder of a catholic priest. I almost fell into pieces when she told me that was my confessor, a very old priest that was doing the masss in the cathedral of Santiago. A guy came with a knife and slaight his throat to end up stabbing him to death.
I couldn't understand this. That was one of the most understanding and wise men I've had the oportunity to talk to. He comforted me so many times. He used to say to me "you are so young, you have your whole life ahead, I'm so old, I am almost ready to leave so I can't change very much, but you, you never despair".
Then my mom apologized, she thought that I had already read the news, and of course, I didn't that day. I didn't know what to think. I kept asking myself why. Why this man? Who did he ever hurt? Why did this happen?
For my own surprise I wasn't really mad, I was really sad and I couldn't stop some tears from coming up. However a sweet feeling of compassion and forgiveness replaced every bad feeling. I guess that is the best thing that people like this priest can leave to the rest of the world. Thinking of all the good things this priest shared and trying to think of the way that he would think I was capable for first time in my life to easily forgive. I went to my room and lighted up some candles for him and then I prayed.
Monday. Another bizarre new showed up. The priest that celebrated my wedding was taken to jail. He is a very good man, and he didn't deserve to be treated like that. He has been giving support to a girl from an Institution that he runs, and this girl is accusing a prominent politician of participanting in the parties of the worst pedophilian in the chilean history, and being abussed by him. The girl and the priest were taken to jail acussed of false testimony, the first , and induction to false testimony, the second. I know this priest enough to know that he didn't do such a thing. Thankfully this order was revoked byt the court, 3 votes to 0, and now both are free again.
Tuesday. During the first hours of the morning I woke up with a strange pain on my neck. I sat up and rubbed it. I thought that probably it was because of a bad position to sleep, so I chenged it and went back to sleep. When the alarm clok went off I tried to get up and I couldn't. The pain on my neck was so intense that wouldn't allow me to move a muscle without making me regret it later. I needed to get up to go to work so I handled the way to get off the bed and walk a few steps when suddenly a horrible pain made me almost fall on the floor. I couldn't help to scream like mad and the tears burst. I couldn't move and I was only able to put my hand on my neck and cry for help. My husband run to me and figured out the way to put me back into bed. That was unbelievably painfull. And I couldn't stop screaming until I was completely inmovilized facing the ceiling. Then my husband called our jobs to tell them that we would be late. We still thought that it would pass in a few hours. He put a heating pad on my neck, an antiflamatory in my mouth and with a straw he was able to put some water down my throat.
The next day I was able to move so I went to work, but up to date I still feel some annoyance in my neck.
Other strange things have happened since then but I can't quit remember right now and I'm running out of energy to tell them anyways

Wednesday, July 21, 2004


Tonight I will sleep after 3 or 4 weeks of restless survival. My kitty is being spayed right now. My nice neighbor Jacqueline,  had the nice gesture of taking the kitty to the vet this morning. She feels guilty because she was the one that brought it to the neighborhood after finding her crying outside the Rex Center in Kettering.
I love my kitty, but she was driving me nuts. I was unable to sleep because she thinks that midnight is the best hour to play, and playing in my bedroom is not an option, she demands to play in the living room with her catnip-frog-toy. And there, me or my husband goes with the stupid rat or frog-toy to play with her until she decides that we are allowed to go back to our bed.
This weekend she started on heat again. Yeah, living hell. We closed our bedroom door and I wear earplugs and apply a dosage of sleeping pills because what comes later is apocalyptic. She stop meowing and starts crying like a baby in despair, and then start scratching the door, when she understand that it won't work she will start bumping against it. A couple days ago my husband showed me a hole on my carpet.  Yeap, that bad.
I can hardly believe that tonight I will be able to sleep. I'm happy... and guilty at the same time.
My poor kitty is sacrificing her orgasms so I can sleep and stop wearing earplugs. She must be so sad and confused. She probably is feeling lost and forsaken.
My husband just called. Said that Jackie told him that she called the hospital and everything is ok and the kitty is fine. She will sleep over. Tomorrow Jackie will go to take her home and then we will see.
Quoting Nellie McKay : "... miss her little kitty touch, does she miss me, does she care, Oh I miss her kitty stare."

Tuesday, July 20, 2004

It's raining blogs!!!

My youngest sister sent me an email inviting me to check into this blog. It's funny because now it feels kind of strange to read in spanish again. Actually I have developed a sort  of aversion towards spanish and is not because I don't like spanish, I love my native language and I am the kind of person that thinks that Spanish language is a miracle of civilization, so rich and wonderful that it can't be compared to any other language.  The problem is that everytime I read something in spanish is so full of mexican or caribean slang that I don't feel familiar with it. So in some way I don't feel a part of this.
I just bought a book called "The other history of the United States" from Zinn. Very interesting. I bought it because I was looking a book to learn more about the history of this country. I believe it's my duty to learn about the land where I am living in.  Also I need to learn about the constitution of this country so I can better understand it. I read a little bit of it some days ago and It's very interesting to understand and see how some people interpret the amendments.
And also I have to admitt that I would love to embarrase some people by knowing about their history better than themselves, the same way that I love embarrase some of my own people of my country by having my husband knowing how to dance the national dance better than them.
Am I too evil??